FB-RSS

Photo - A mothers story: Today I sat and looked through all the pictures, ultra sounds of my daughter & son remembering how it felt to feel the first movement the first real kick,the heartbeat my daughters head on my belly as she knew mommy had her brother in there. Every birthday card only a couple as my son at only 9 months my daughter only weeks after turning 2 yrs old were stolen from me due to false allegations proven false but it didnt matter they wanted my children! This happend less than 6 months after finalizing a divorce and gaining FDM both physical/legal. Seeing both hand and foot impressions there outfits socks booties hats & toys i started to cry as all I wanted was for us to be a family even if it was the three of us, Now I do not know if i will even get to see them grow up and everyone says what happened to me is unjust i did nothing there is no reason i should have been done this way but no one will help me! I just want to be a mom i want to see my kids grow up. I KNOW I did not deserve to have my children stolen from my life and I admit i was not interested in watching a movie my bf Kim Adams told me to watch (Miracles from heaven) but i watched it and there was a part where this young girl looked at her mom and said Mommy i dont want to hurt you, but please can i just go to heaven so the pain will stop because I cant take it anymore. I stopped to think that very thing when I was told they were TPR from me & my babies due to Time!! OH lets not forget how many times they had to mention how much there adoptable and of course AZ being the #1 state and its a huge business out here my children were a huge comodidty. Im sorry but i thought this was AMERICA since when are we selling people, children, child trafficing, there should never be a price put on anyones head let alone an innocent child! I saw a difference in my life the moment i saw there faces i had there hand wrapped around my finger i knew my life would never be the same, but nothing like this I would have never brought children into the world to be put up on an auction block especially after I carried them both almost 2 years straight in total. I now had become a protector a teacher a rolemodel so many things racing through my head of what i had to do to be what they needed as they grew the personalities and the actions of feerlessness and purity made me thrive to be the best I could be, and no matter what I would never allow them to feel the pain I had learned to grow accustom to. The fear of being used abandoned abused or beartbroken i became even more protective knowing the world we live in and the anger hate spite revenge greed corruption evil vindictive manipulative and so much more my babies never judged never said one unkind thing they were always so sweet helpful selfless respectful appreciative and affectionate as i wanted them to have what I had so desperstly yearned for as a child. Even at the age of 3 I remeber moving from home to.home to city to city and schools to the point I lost count, I lost feeling, didnt care I was out for me and that was it or you dont survive! I was not gong to allow this for my children one of the reasons I waited as long as I did to have children as I had wantd them long time ago! I do not see how my children are being stripped from my life how can as there mother be ereased from thier very existance as if I was some kind of mistake and only the one to create them and bring them into this world. Do my children even remember all the stories songs movies games and places we went and the things we did? Do these strangers who now get to hold my children close feel there hands behind there neck as they hold and kiss there cheeks and foreheads know the R E A L truth? Do they know the children they paid to adopt have a REAL MOTHER OUT THERE DYING INSIDE?A MOTHER not a junkie? Not mentally ill? Still had her childrens play areas, room, beds toys bikes dolls scòoters costumes and everything they ever did in day car art project and more and they have pets they love and had chores they loved to do a chart of how tall they wanted to check every day. Do they know how much they love there mother and that she never harmed them never did anything but love them unconditionally and we would sing and say we love each other to the moon and back so they would not cry and clench on to me when they had to leave. It had become apart of a daily ruitine and to take them from my life after I carried them those children are ME I am them I want to be apart of there lives if even from a distance i want to see them grow i want to see them become who they want to be and hope some of the things I taught them they remember. Will they remember they have a real mother who loves them who did NOT give them up or leave them but was told I lost my god given right by a lady in a black robe who had never met my children! I was there when there father chose to leave that was NOT an option for me,we never spoke badly about him we just said we were all we needed and its ok to always love someone but you dont have to like the choices they make and its there choice to want to know things later or not but I did not want to cause any pain and or hurt to such amazing faces and big hearts it hurts so much i hear the little girl in the movie and i see the mother understand she wants to just go home and be a kid again and she unselfishly does and a miracle happened which is a chain of events through out the movie but reminded me why she wanted me to watch it as she knew I have been angry as the people I have lost in my life have been people i never thought would have betrayed me taken the only things in my life away and are trying to make it so I can never be apart of there lives see or talk to them knowing at 3 my brother and I had the same thing happen to us, except he was adopted and now were seperated and he has a life and family. I was HAPPY finally for once in my life i had everything I wanted until it was #taken i lost my faith my hope courage, my fight, felt a total failure at everything, i lost jobs, friends, partners my last of the family i had and cant even have another child because I can not afford to have the procedure which isnt that much but it is when you spent 3 years fighting a system that cant be broken with out a Johnny cockran anti Cps Attorney and the money spent to gain FDM was to start over a new beginning but it didnt happen that way instead im Left to live while I grieve the lives of my Only two children who are alive and look at everything they had and the memories the pictures and see an image of a strange lady getting to brush my daughters hair, be there for prom, wipe there tears know how undeservising they truly are no matter how much money if i had adopted a child to find out they were stolen i couldnt bear to hurt those children and not allow them to be apart of there lives somehow someway. Will my children remember me? Do they miss me? Think of me? Are they punished if they ask or say anything and what are they being told? I have not seen my childrens faces in almost 4 months and its been over 750 days since they were #taken and should have never been but I was a easy target my children beautiful adoptable and had them lined up long before they tried to change my plan. They allow you to continue to visit your children and feed them and hold them and play with them until it just stops and you feel like your hearts being torn from your chest as the only 2 reasons left for me to be the best me were now already spending time with a new family! My daughter asking me if it was ok to be nice to this man and women they had been spending the weekends with, as they are nice to her and her brother. Of course I told her always be nice in return and respectful and make sure you look after your brother. She replied i always do mom you know we love you and we hold your heart together noone will ever take us away from you! I tried to answer but its like the words wouldnt come out so I just held her as close as i could so she couldnt see my eyes pour like an open faucet the tears made my entire body ache. The last day we sat on my bed she made me watch this Disney movie "up" and both of them laying on top of me hugging me kissing me and holding my hand putting it up to there faces kissing it and telling me how lucky they were to have me and me them and they love to spend time and want to stay ... So i watched the movie i had never seen before and it was cute and my daughter during the part of the movie where the old man decides to not move she put her head on my shoulder wispered in my ear " can we just do that" i wantes to scream out loud as i felt it inside the why is god allowing this to happen to me happen to them every time we walk to the car they beg me to stay. The man had filled the entire fireplace with balloons and helium and cut them and the house and him took off up and was gone! If you have not seen the movie maybe u will see why she said that and for a 4 yr old little girl to tell me that i told her i would want nothing more then to take her brother and her as far away into the clouds like that into a far away land but mommy couldnt and she did not understand why and hung her head as if i didnt want them. The lump in my throat and the swelled up tears in my eyes were unbearable i could not hold them back plus she knew something was not right as she had told me things asking why we were not seeing each other as long and or why she couldnt see me the next day and I did not know how to answer she was starting to get angry and screaming kicking and begging to not leave and I told her I was doing everything ai could and i would never ever leave them I would never walk away as they are my angels my heart and if i dont have them mommy cant breatbe ad they are the air that keeps me alive. Aug 23rd TPR of both my babies due to time I have had no way to get any message to my daughter she turned 5 ive never missed anything and i was told i couldnt give her the gifts she knew I had got her. I was not going to call or email or push the subject by contacting whom they were with as much as i wanted to but i didnt want there to be any negative reprecussions yet i want to know there ok i want to see them how can i be cut out of my kids lives as if i dont exist to them and im what am I suppose to do now what kind of life am I suppose to lead when I see now what these people do to you they tear you apart and destroy the very life inside of you so you are so weak you can barely push forward that is there JOB its sick Whats left for me now? Pack up years of my kids lives memories i cant go to the store without falling apart these people ruined my life! every where i look i see decorations kids and laughter and all i feel is pain and grief. I do not know how i am even suppose to go on from here and accept that this the life God had for me and this is the future and or best interest of my children? I wish there were doctors that would help moms like me who cant afford the procedure and have had there children stolen and offer to helo them so they csn dtill have a family before its too late. I would have never had the tubal done if i ever thought people who have no clue about my life my kids hust go off what they presume woulld steal my kids to sell to a family who can not possibly know that they have children that belong to someone who was done unjustly by a corrupt system!? Can they??? Are they allowed to do there own research to see?? Or they just go off what there told and change names socials and make it impossible to find them as they lock there records and the medical issues in my family that my kids need to know they dont know? I do not see how I an american citizen can have someone come into my home with out a warrant take my kids based on lies proven to be lies and then take them and not listen one thing i say even though i comply 100%!!(MISSING)a(MISSING)nd then say sorry we own your kids your nothing now... go away! #TAKEN #AmericasTakenChildren: A mothers story: Today I sat and looked through all the pictures, ultra sounds of my daughter & son remembering how it felt to feel the first movement the first real kick,the heartbeat my daughters head on my belly as she knew mommy had her brother in there. Every birthday card only a couple as my son at only 9 months my daughter only weeks after turning 2 yrs old were stolen from me due to false allegations proven false but it didnt matter they wanted my children! This happend less than 6 months after finalizing a divorce and gaining FDM both physical/legal. Seeing both hand and foot impressions there outfits socks booties hats & toys i started to cry as all I wanted was for us to be a family even if it was the three of us, Now I do not know if i will even get to see them grow up and everyone says what happened to me is unjust i did nothing there is no reason i should have been done this way but no one will help me! I just want to be a mom i want to see my kids grow up. I KNOW I did not deserve to have my children stolen from my life and I admit i was not interested in watching a movie my bf Kim Adams told me to watch (Miracles from heaven) but i watched it and there was a part where this young girl looked at her mom and said Mommy i dont want to hurt you, but please can i just go to heaven so the pain will stop because I cant take it anymore. I stopped to think that very thing when I was told they were TPR from me & my babies due to Time!! OH lets not forget how many times they had to mention how much there adoptable and of course AZ being the #1 state and its a huge business out here my children were a huge comodidty. Im sorry but i thought this was AMERICA since when are we selling people, children, child trafficing, there should never be a price put on anyones head let alone an innocent child! I saw a difference in my life the moment i saw there faces i had there hand wrapped around my finger i knew my life would never be the same, but nothing like this I would have never brought children into the world to be put up on an auction block especially after I carried them both almost 2 years straight in total. I now had become a protector a teacher a rolemodel so many things racing through my head of what i had to do to be what they needed as they grew the personalities and the actions of feerlessness and purity made me thrive to be the best I could be, and no matter what I would never allow them to feel the pain I had learned to grow accustom to. The fear of being used abandoned abused or beartbroken i became even more protective knowing the world we live in and the anger hate spite revenge greed corruption evil vindictive manipulative and so much more my babies never judged never said one unkind thing they were always so sweet helpful selfless respectful appreciative and affectionate as i wanted them to have what I had so desperstly yearned for as a child. Even at the age of 3 I remeber moving from home to.home to city to city and schools to the point I lost count, I lost feeling, didnt care I was out for me and that was it or you dont survive! I was not gong to allow this for my children one of the reasons I waited as long as I did to have children as I had wantd them long time ago! I do not see how my children are being stripped from my life how can as there mother be ereased from thier very existance as if I was some kind of mistake and only the one to create them and bring them into this world. Do my children even remember all the stories songs movies games and places we went and the things we did? Do these strangers who now get to hold my children close feel there hands behind there neck as they hold and kiss there cheeks and foreheads know the R E A L truth? Do they know the children they paid to adopt have a REAL MOTHER OUT THERE DYING INSIDE?A MOTHER not a junkie? Not mentally ill? Still had her childrens play areas, room, beds toys bikes dolls scòoters costumes and everything they ever did in day car art project and more and they have pets they love and had chores they loved to do a chart of how tall they wanted to check every day. Do they know how much they love there mother and that she never harmed them never did anything but love them unconditionally and we would sing and say we love each other to the moon and back so they would not cry and clench on to me when they had to leave. It had become apart of a daily ruitine and to take them from my life after I carried them those children are ME I am them I want to be apart of there lives if even from a distance i want to see them grow i want to see them become who they want to be and hope some of the things I taught them they remember. Will they remember they have a real mother who loves them who did NOT give them up or leave them but was told I lost my god given right by a lady in a black robe who had never met my children! I was there when there father chose to leave that was NOT an option for me,we never spoke badly about him we just said we were all we needed and its ok to always love someone but you dont have to like the choices they make and its there choice to want to know things later or not but I did not want to cause any pain and or hurt to such amazing faces and big hearts it hurts so much i hear the little girl in the movie and i see the mother understand she wants to just go home and be a kid again and she unselfishly does and a miracle happened which is a chain of events through out the movie but reminded me why she wanted me to watch it as she knew I have been angry as the people I have lost in my life have been people i never thought would have betrayed me taken the only things in my life away and are trying to make it so I can never be apart of there lives see or talk to them knowing at 3 my brother and I had the same thing happen to us, except he was adopted and now were seperated and he has a life and family. I was HAPPY finally for once in my life i had everything I wanted until it was #taken i lost my faith my hope courage, my fight, felt a total failure at everything, i lost jobs, friends, partners my last of the family i had and cant even have another child because I can not afford to have the procedure which isnt that much but it is when you spent 3 years fighting a system that cant be broken with out a Johnny cockran anti Cps Attorney and the money spent to gain FDM was to start over a new beginning but it didnt happen that way instead im Left to live while I grieve the lives of my Only two children who are alive and look at everything they had and the memories the pictures and see an image of a strange lady getting to brush my daughters hair, be there for prom, wipe there tears know how undeservising they truly are no matter how much money if i had adopted a child to find out they were stolen i couldnt bear to hurt those children and not allow them to be apart of there lives somehow someway. Will my children remember me? Do they miss me? Think of me? Are they punished if they ask or say anything and what are they being told? I have not seen my childrens faces in almost 4 months and its been over 750 days since they were #taken and should have never been but I was a easy target my children beautiful adoptable and had them lined up long before they tried to change my plan. They allow you to continue to visit your children and feed them and hold them and play with them until it just stops and you feel like your hearts being torn from your chest as the only 2 reasons left for me to be the best me were now already spending time with a new family! My daughter asking me if it was ok to be nice to this man and women they had been spending the weekends with, as they are nice to her and her brother. Of course I told her always be nice in return and respectful and make sure you look after your brother. She replied i always do mom you know we love you and we hold your heart together noone will ever take us away from you! I tried to answer but its like the words wouldnt come out so I just held her as close as i could so she couldnt see my eyes pour like an open faucet the tears made my entire body ache. The last day we sat on my bed she made me watch this Disney movie "up" and both of them laying on top of me hugging me kissing me and holding my hand putting it up to there faces kissing it and telling me how lucky they were to have me and me them and they love to spend time and want to stay ... So i watched the movie i had never seen before and it was cute and my daughter during the part of the movie where the old man decides to not move she put her head on my shoulder wispered in my ear " can we just do that" i wantes to scream out loud as i felt it inside the why is god allowing this to happen to me happen to them every time we walk to the car they beg me to stay. The man had filled the entire fireplace with balloons and helium and cut them and the house and him took off up and was gone! If you have not seen the movie maybe u will see why she said that and for a 4 yr old little girl to tell me that i told her i would want nothing more then to take her brother and her as far away into the clouds like that into a far away land but mommy couldnt and she did not understand why and hung her head as if i didnt want them. The lump in my throat and the swelled up tears in my eyes were unbearable i could not hold them back plus she knew something was not right as she had told me things asking why we were not seeing each other as long and or why she couldnt see me the next day and I did not know how to answer she was starting to get angry and screaming kicking and begging to not leave and I told her I was doing everything ai could and i would never ever leave them I would never walk away as they are my angels my heart and if i dont have them mommy cant breatbe ad they are the air that keeps me alive. Aug 23rd TPR of both my babies due to time I have had no way to get any message to my daughter she turned 5 ive never missed anything and i was told i couldnt give her the gifts she knew I had got her. I was not going to call or email or push the subject by contacting whom they were with as much as i wanted to but i didnt want there to be any negative reprecussions yet i want to know there ok i want to see them how can i be cut out of my kids lives as if i dont exist to them and im what am I suppose to do now what kind of life am I suppose to lead when I see now what these people do to you they tear you apart and destroy the very life inside of you so you are so weak you can barely push forward that is there JOB its sick Whats left for me now? Pack up years of my kids lives memories i cant go to the store without falling apart these people ruined my life! every where i look i see decorations kids and laughter and all i feel is pain and grief. I do not know how i am even suppose to go on from here and accept that this the life God had for me and this is the future and or best interest of my children? I wish there were doctors that would help moms like me who cant afford the procedure and have had there children stolen and offer to helo them so they csn dtill have a family before its too late. I would have never had the tubal done if i ever thought people who have no clue about my life my kids hust go off what they presume woulld steal my kids to sell to a family who can not possibly know that they have children that belong to someone who was done unjustly by a corrupt system!? Can they??? Are they allowed to do there own research to see?? Or they just go off what there told and change names socials and make it impossible to find them as they lock there records and the medical issues in my family that my kids need to know they dont know? I do not see how I an american citizen can have someone come into my home with out a warrant take my kids based on lies proven to be lies and then take them and not listen one thing i say even though i comply 100%!!(MISSING)a(MISSING)nd then say sorry we own your kids your nothing now... go away! #TAKEN #AmericasTakenChildren

from FB-RSS feed for Op Expose DCS Arizona #opexposecps http://bit.ly/2eRctBY